Random update

Yo! Hahah people in TX don’t say this word so much as New Yorkers do… Why school is so tiring? And why holiday is so boring? Many things happened. Conclusion from the last post: Lily and Cindy are not in their talking terms anymore and I got deleted from Facebook by Lily. LMAO that’s a pretty good thing for me I guess because I don’t like her that much. Been hanging out with Cindy and Sam a lot lately. Phase Ten is a must whenever we hang out.. or UNO! J I realized I became more outgoing than before. Is it good or bad? Hmmm.. not sure. It better be a good one!! Lol! Finally my dad got his manager post at Fort Worth airport. God bless me, I don’t have to be nagged by him everyday after school. I still have to eat his cooking every night though since my mom gets off from work late. Ahhh… who to blame if I don’t know how to cook and too lazy to do it. AND good news! My mom finally started to plan for our trip back to Msia next year. Good thing… taking the SAT for the 2nd time again next week. After that I gotta start writing those college essays. Hope everything will be done by December and party time. Way too busy during school days. This weekend is Halloween! No trick or treat this year.. too old for that.. still gonna eat many candies though J Going to mall with Cindy and a new Japanese girl - student exchange program. Everything will be fine because I said so!! Ciao.
oh yeah.. at school again! HEHEHEHE

I had to STOP

hmmm I think I had been "moving" so fast until I don't realize the people besides me could not catch up. I just woke up from my own "too into myself" dream. I'm so into something until I never care about things around me and also myself. Finally.................. I became depressed now. I could not control my freaking temper anymore. I just give a damn to those who piss me off.
Something happened today. A fight. I kind of involve in it but not directly. Lily and Cindy got into this fight and things got very very bad now. Maybe... I never really got into some relationships after I came here. So it's kinda awkward to me and also brings back so much memories of the past. I kind of can't "digest" everything now. It's really like 20months I never had such thing happen to me. I hardly had any friends in NY and now.. =_= My brain is all messed up now.
Awkward and complicated.

Pissed off.

alright here i am again fussing craps. if you're reading this, I AM SORRY but i just need a place to SHOOT everything out. i'm not in a good mood so i'm cursing all the way and i don't give a shit to SOMEBODY who is i don't know whether too oblivious that i freaking hate her to death or just pretending like a stupid bitch. EVERYDAY freaking day! the tardy bell of period 4 rings, A FREAKING HARBINGER to remind me that i'm sitting with this particular her in the computer class. i just want to be nice okay, and she's forcing me to say fuck off bitch like everyday. i just got enough of her stupid "I DON'T KNOW" shit. Here, if someone suck at english and don't care to pay any attention to what the teacher is teaching, how BITCH is that? please go to hell and i am freaking not going to explain everything to her ONCE AGAIN. I HATE REPEATING STUFFS. i can swear to God, 80% of her stupid projects and works are helped/done by me. just like "Hey SiVA how you du tis?" WTF please.... don't even know how to pronounce my name. get the fk outta my face. not paying attention is one. she even play GMAIL and chat with all her Myanmar or Philippines whatever friends. that really pissed me off. so i just did an experiment [i didn't talk or help her and pretended to doze off] and..... she didn't finish the easiest work in 90mins. oh my god......
okay. i'm much better now :) sorry for the !@#$%^&* language

how am I?

Hmmm... it's been a while since I abandoned this thingy again. literally.... guess what! I'm using my school computer now. By the way my new school is Lewisville High School, not Benjamin N. Cardozo High School anymore.. I miss it so much. I've not been updating like so long and things happened more than i can remember. I can't get to post everything here. I hate my new school because I'm not used to going off at 4.05pm everyday and not used to have like 90mins A PERIOD. yes, 90mins and the 3rd period is more I guess. just think about how I tried to survive in Miss Yip's tutoring for 2hours back then, and you'll know how hard it is for me to pass 90mins in a class. Almost, almost everyday I fall asleep in my Physics class. I can't say that i hate Physics just because I failed Lai Mann Keong's class. I neither like nor hate, but it's mad boring.

You can tell that senior year sucks by how often I update this blog. Too busy to do anything. Reaching home at 5pm everyday with homework and by the time I'm done, it's probably 8pm? and I'll have my dinner, relax a while then take a bath. You know how long I bath right... so it's already like 11 or 12pm.. I have Spanish quiz everyday! Seriously. So Ryan helps me with the memorizing part every night until 1pm. So how many hours can I have a good rest until my dad kicks me up the next morning. Sometimes I like it this busy because I feel that time flies faster than I could catch up. I had been telling my parents, myself to prepare for the SAT test on October and ended up postponed it to November. College applications are due by December so those essays and paperwork... DAMN! The TAKS test is like 2weeks away. Why I am working so hard? OMG... I'm trying to squeeze in the top 10% graduating seniors in my school so that I'll be accepted to all the Texas state colleges a.k.a. universities. Well, maybe I can dream about it :D Recently I'm having some problems with this DEPRESSION kinda thing. Nothing seems to please me and I quarreled a lot. Kinda fed up about myself and everyone. It's alright! My brothers will be my victims.

Someone asked me did I know some new friends here. Sure! =] more than I had in New York. I have been hanging out a lot with this girl, Cindy. She's a Chinese and she knows Cantonese a little, not fluent though because she's an ABC lololol! Today I'm going ice skating with her. YAY! I went to my parents' friend's daughters' house. BLARGH!!! What I'm trying to say. dang it. >:( Just my friends, Valerie and Hilarie(abcS too). Had a lot of fun taking pictures with them which they put it on facebook EWWW*and i look like a fat ass. Cheers! There's one girl staying with them too, Michele. She's.. well, kinda confused. She's born in New York but then left US with her parents when she's a baby. So she's living in Msia after that and moved back here again 3 years ago. Hard to explain those citizen and resident stuffs here. My parents think she's kinda fake, but I don't know and don't care. =_=

Texas is a place that you really need a car and of course driving license to go around. So I'm getting it when I'm ready. See, another test, driving test. =_= don't treat me like a slave God. There's so many school events and games like continuously. Yesterday was the 80s Day where you dress like those high school students in the 80s. LOL today is the Homecoming Day, just like prom but not that formal. A dance night for short. They wear those corsages with long ribbons and Christmas decorations on them just like a walking-Xmas-tree. Too bad I can't take any pictures because cell phone rule is even stricter than NY. (TO BE CONTINUED)
So, I just got back home from school and now continue this post. I forgot that today is the Pep Rally schedule so we go off earlier like 30minutes. Been talking about school stuffs a lot huh. PERIOD

Let's talk about my miserable life. I have been living with a grumpy and never satisfying man, MY DAD ever since he came back from Msia. I don't know what the hell is wrong with him- maybe misses his father, my granpa too much. THIS DUDE NEEDS TO COOL DOWN OKAY. Seems like me, NOTHING satisfies him. I don't know what to do with this dad here. Just like everyday after school I have to see him around the house makes me headache. I'm so tired of school, tired of tests, tired of college stuffs, tired of SAT and now..... I'm tired of his attitude. He got this Bipolar attitude. I don't know when he's joking with me and when he's serious. I'M FUCKING TIRED OF GUESSING. I HATE TO GUESS

• I just had a rather big argument with him after school. The cause of this is our freaking attitudes. I KNOW! And he refused to take me and my brothers to ice skating tonight. Poor Cindy :( I hate to beg people, so no way I can make things better. I hate myself.
  

*SIGH* Guess I'll be posting again a century later